The Sad Saga of St John

(Performed at Tai Graduation, June 2004; AHG, October 9, 2004) I remember that sad day In the year 2002 When I heard the TV say St. John ain't good for you I reckon they forgot What you really oughta know Two billion bucks of Zoloft Placed second to placebo

And they also forgot The good Doctor Cott The first one to outline The study design But after Cott was gone The design it was redrawn With no redeeming graces They took on basket cases.

They forgot the good St. John Was the German's number one With better Deutsche direction They take John for their depression What's the story we were fed By our US Institute They misled us instead Saying herbs they ain't "sehr gut"

Our NInstitutes of Health Misleads us local yuppies They rob health to pay off wealth Their studies are "hushpuppies" And the press in all its wisdom Missed one important score St. John reduced orgasm But Zoloft reduced it more

Hushpuppy

A most depressing tune Hushpuppy

Keep howling at the Moon St. John

Ain't you groaning in your grave Pray John

Make the NIH behave

They muted the real news The placebo beat the pill But the news gave me the blues Like liars always will

They forgot to tip us off What I think we all should know Two-billion-dollar Zoloft Was poorer than placebo

That's what really was the news Hope that everybody knows Zoloft did really lose Outdone by mere placebos

So I'm plowing up my herbs They're much too hard to grow Gonna move out to the suburbs And grow me some placebo

Hushpuppy

A most depressing tune Hushpuppy

Keep howling at the Moon Hushpuppy

Did you want the herb to lose? Your study Was really just a ruse St. John

Ain't you groaning in your grave Pray John

Make the NIH behave

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